The end of the whole mess....

I know you, I feel you, I've held you, and I love you. All the things I know, I know but one for the truth. One single truth in my heart... We were made for us. All the things I've seen, I have seen the love in your soul. That light in your eyes has found me... I know deep from the depths of my knowing That I can love you perfect... And I do. I love you perfect, and you find ways to sadden me. To dim my eyes and flood the spark in my heart That could make you the princess you are... If only you could see me for me. And what I am. And what I could be to you. If only you would let me...

The woman

I long to be there, holding you soft...
I ache to touch your skin...

You tell me quietly in my dreams that I am your one,
I know that as the truth, for you are mine...

What we have known is gone, just what we are is perfect.
I thought, until I met you there was no one to make me happy,
No one that could bring this peace to my heart.
Then there was you...
Then there was you...

You, and I became one on that silent beach last September, and now,
We are perfect...
We are perfect...

I was down, I was me.
No one special...
Not worth time...
And you found me.

You found me, fell for me, and made me.
You made me.

You made me us.
I made you see love.
We are perfect.
Then there was us.

There was us.
There is us.

And we are perfect.

To all the things I hold close...
I find myself wanting you, needing you.
Lusting after you.
Of all the things I am, nothing of what I was.

I find in myself, the love I never knew was...
Possible.

Impossible

I know all things there are now.
All things in love, wanting, needing...
I find myself thinking, knowing, and seeing you.

Obviously not

As I lay here tonight I do not sleep,

As you are on my mind.

As I lay here, I cannot dream

Because I smell you.

I shut my eyes and I see you.

I open them to the darkness and I

Hear your words.

As I lay here , in your bed, I

Know we will forever be just friends,

And that fact keeps me awake

Tonight, Because I feel the way I do

For you, and I cannot change it.

I know your mind and cannot

Change that. You will waste you life

Waiting for the one you love to fully

Love you, as I lay here tonight,

Doing just that.

So many things I should have done differently

If I could step back I

Would never pull away from that kiss.

I would have held you longer.

I see now that I have failed in

My life, Failed for not having you

Sooner... Failed for not having you.

Your eyes speak to me now,

And I see in them that it could

Have been more than what we never had...

It will be more than we don't have now.

It will be for real...

It will be forever...

It will be for us...

I see your body now, and I

Feel my soul cry...

Such beauty.

Beauty that I never held,

Beauty I never pleased...

Not yet.

I hear your words, sweet words

In my ears and I turn to

Kiss your body, only, you're not there...

You have broken my

Mind, without knowing, without trying.

You have made me the man which

I am tonight...

Broken and falling in love.

I find myself thinking of her, and it saddens me.

I found love in her, and I threw it away.

She touched my face as a friend, and kissed my

Lips as a lover...

And I threw it away.

She was my friend for ever, and after

A short while, she was my love...

And I threw it all away.

I lost my friend, my love, my lover,

And her happiness...

I threw it all away and I broke her heart.

I threw it all away and lost my friend.

I threw it all away and ruined my life.

I threw it all away and I know she will be happy.

Such a caring friend, a caring love, a beautiful person,

And I threw it all away...

And now

I hear a song, and I need

You. I need your heart in my

Hands.

My hands do not know your body,

My lips know not you lips,

My ears have not heard you voice,

My eyes have not seen your smile.

But my soul knows your love,

And my heart knows our peace...

And that is enough... For now.

My dreams know your kiss, my

Thoughts wander to you always...

We have not touched, forever.

We have not loved, forever.

But someday...

Forever...

Forever in love, forever in us.

-About ready to give up-

-The young Japanese girl in the brown sweater.

What challenges have you faced, beautiful,

But shy. What problems have your small

Nimble hands sorted through?-

All things being equal, I have broken.

I have broken in my soul, and I hurt.

I am hurting, and you don't care.

You don't care, and I am alone.

I am alone, and you don't care...

Just a note...

To those not so faithful followers, just a note.

I have the desire to get off my mind, this fact.

All the entries on here that have any form of the word

Obvious, are about one person in particular...

She will never read them here. But I had to unload

That fact from my mind....

Of all the time, from then to now, I have thought often

Of you. I have been so lonely without you.

Not knowing of your life, of your love, of your soul,

I lost my mind. To think of you so often, was killing me.

I found my way in my own life, I felt my soul lifting from

The darkness, as I forgot you. Slowly, I had to leave you in the

Past, leave the thought of our time together there.

I began to find what I needed, without you. Or so I thought...

I was so happy for a time, without you, then, my world fell to pieces.

And for the years from then to now, I was only me...

I was only me and you were there, happy in your way, in your

Life...

And I was here...

I found my happiness without you, and lost it again...

I found my happiness without you, and lost it again, when I lost you...

I was resigned to my dark life, and was satisfied with that.

I was by myself, and for once happy to be me...

Then you came to me, you found me, and I found the happiness that

Was missing for those years, from then to now...

You found me and I found my life, my soul, my happiness...

Obviously she doesn't care

You say you can't love me that way...

Over time, you will realize,

That you wasted all your

Years searching for the love

I have for you now.

You've broken my heart,

Crushed my soul,

And I can do nothing,

But love you still...

Thank you L. Cohen

To quote a man, that has been in my life,

All my life.

He is not my father...

These simple words, have kept me happy,

During the worst years.

He is not my brother...

A line or two a day, kept me safe,

When I was hurting.

He is not my friend...

Put in this way, the words kept me happy,

When I was down.

He is not my enemy...

Song that made me see love, gave me peace,

When I had neither.

He is not my God...

Emotion, pure and simple, make me the man that I am,

When I thought that I could not go on.

He is just a man...

He is a great man, he is inspiration,

To my life,

To my words,

In my dreams,

For my dreams, and I thank him...

The energy that I feel right now, could kill a soul.

Take a man's life, and break him.

If only it was anger, I could kill.

If it was happiness, I could smile.

If it was pain, I would die.

If it was peace, I'd never fight.

If it was love, I'd never lie.

If it was you, you could find it in your heart, to love me again.

If it was me, I could find it in my heart, to love me.

These emotions, I've never felt, not with this power.

These emotions, they will pass soon, so I must go.

Before it is happiness, pain, peace,

Or love...

-I can love you perfect-

I belong to what is here, what is now.

I am here, I am the now.

I am you, I am everywhere, I know all that is

To be known.

I know you, you know nothing.

You wish to be me, you wish, and your

Dreams can always come true, and riches flounder

In the sight of your beauty. I know you.

But you know nothing... But hate.

I know you, I am you, I am love, I am peace,

I... Am riches, I am sweet, bitterness in this world.

I can make my time, I can be all things, all that

You wish me to be.

Will you love me, that way you can do so well?

Will you love me, when I am ugly, when my riches

Are gone? Will you love me, when I hate me?

Will you give up all you know to be true, to be

With me?

Will you ever know me, like I know you?

How long can you live, without my attention?

How long can you go, without my love to

Make you at peace with the world?

Can you survive without the knowledge of what I am?

What I know, what I can be?

How long can you be, without me?

You looked the way I remember you, when I

Saw you tonight... Perfect.

And in love.

I don't know him, but I know he can't love you,

Not the way I did.

I don't like him, he can't be me, for I am me,

And I am confused.

We are gone, we are apart, and I can't touch you

The way I once did.

I can no longer hold you

With the passion that I once had, your eyes are empty.

Will the chance ever return?

Will I ever have you again?

Will I ever know?

No.

For you are happy without me, and I

Am here, without love, sad and distant, alone.

I will cry, I will weep. And I will die

Soon enough to please you, and

Make you smile once more.

The first sign of obvious

Call it what you may,

Crying is Crying, pain is pain.

In you, I know these things.

You see me in your dreams, the

Very thought of us, in love, you said was

So strange. To hear those undying words

From my lips.

I've so often thought of the two of us,

That my heart and soul, collide in perfection.

I feel such yearning in my being.

I only pray, love will come of this.

Or if not, I can only be happy in your

Happiness. You're the one I know, the one I feel.